My personal experience with “The Luther” Burger

Since today’s Friday Five was all about Burgers, I thought I’d republish this piece about me eating a Luther, rather than send you to its original location on my old livejournal. That way you don’t have to read any shitty poetry. Now as I said, I originally wrote this in February 2006 on livejournal, so a few things. 1) Yes, I am aware, I’ve put on a lot of weight. 2) That was when I was poor, so no digital camera. I bought a disposable film camera (remember those?) and paid for the photodisc, hence the shitty quality. 3) Also being 2006, I had no idea how to make an animated gif. I still don’t, but it was much harder back then. So now, let’s all take a trip back in time to when The Boondocks was still a thing . . .

Now I don’t know if you all watch The Boondocks, but there was an episode titled “The Itis”, in which they opened a soul food restaurant that sold nothing but the aforementioned sandwich, which looked so good I just had to make one of my own. The Luther is 4 quarter pound all beef patties, covered in cheese, fried onions, 5 strips of bacon, all smothered between 2 Krispy Kreme donuts. Now, I had to have one for myself, but I took a few liberties. Here is my story.

First I had to gather up the ingredients. Now, this particular morning, my local Acme did not have any Krispy Kremes, so I had to improvise, and used 2 Hostess iced honey buns instead. And I thought this was just begging to become a BLT, so I added some lettuce and tomato, and some peppers, and a little mayo as well. And 5 pieces of bacon isn’t enough, so I went with 8. That compensates for only using 2 patties, as I can’t fit that many in between two honey buns, let alone on my tiny George Foreman grill. Plus, I used the preformed ones in the freezer. If I made my own I totally would have made a full pounder. Here is the construction of the burger.

First the bun, then some cheese, first patty, the bacon, more cheese, a tomato, lettuce, the second patty, even more cheese, the fried unions, then some hot peppers. Looks damn yummy huh? Oh my god, the best thing I’ve ever eaten, except for all those heart pains.

Those of you who know me know my standard Wawa order is “Italian hoagie w/ everything (double meat, double cheese, bacon, lettuce, tomato, onion, mayo, oil, vinegar, hot peppers, sweet peppers, pickles, salt, pepper, oregano)” and years of eating those means I can shove just about anything in my mouth, but I was ill prepared for this.

I must say, if you get the chance to have one, I recommend it, if you don’t have any preexisting health conditions, and have a few hours to spare, because like in the particular episode, I was fast asleep in like 5 minutes after eating this. MMMMM, but it was damn yummy though. Also, iced honey bun was a bad choice. A glazed honey bun would have worked much better, as the icing did not mesh well with the mayo.

JohnScott is the proud owner of a life size replica Captain Kirk Chair. He is a hoarder of Comic Books, Transformers, and Star Trek action figures. He attended Space Camp as an adult. He has taken vacations to the closing of the Star Trek Experience and the final night Shuttle launch. He has been known to yell at his television when the kids can't put together the damn statue in the Shrine of the Silver Monkey. When not writing for InsufficientScotty, he is a Software Engineer for a major healthcare communications company. You can Email or follow on Twitter @NotEnoughScotty or Facebook